Our dear friend, Sam, forwarded Jesus Is Better Than Santa to me three days before Christmas, and it was just what I needed to get started with my post on St. Nicholas. “I’ll send you the link when I’m done,” I replied.
Looking for Santa
Early October I began setting up the “Kids” page on our church website and, since I really didn’t know much about Santa— our dear St. Nicholas— I wanted kids to learn about his life as well as delve into more— stories, prayers, games, things to do, and more— without the commercialism.
Tough expectations, I thought, until I received a link to Santa Claus and the North Pole from a friend who’d recently discovered the site with her granddaughters. I was impressed with the site’s versatility and the recipes from the kitchen of Mrs. Claus but persisted with my online search until found not just worthwhile sites on the life of St. Nicholas and his wonder-worker status, but also an interesting chapel tour.
Thinking about Christmas
Growing up, I neither visited Santa at the department store nor wrote him a letter; and I never asked for Christmas gifts. Sure, my brother and I were curious about wrapped gifts hidden in the closet or under the tree. Christmas presents were a big mystery to unravel, but on Christmas Day we were glad for whatever we received. Then later, as an adult, I didn’t want to participate in gift exchanges of any kind: not with friends at work or with family members at home. I went through the motions— guilt is an awful monster to contend with— but my heart was never in it. Too costly, too time-consuming, too stressful.
Santa’s mailbox
Then, one Christmas season— the first time I’d driven to the main post office for stamps during the holidays— I discovered Santa’s mailbox near the entryway. Wow! All the way home, I imagined myself driving back to the post office to mail my letter to Santa late Christmas Eve. I’ll finally have my chance, I giggled. Anyway, my kids no longer live at home, so they wouldn’t find out. Besides, if anyone saw me mail a letter to Santa, they’d think I was dropping it off for a child. I was beyond excited, but the weather turned bad. I decided the drive wouldn’t be worth my while, though I did give the letter a lot of thought.
Bottom line? I really wanted to do it, but I didn’t know what to ask for, much less how to write my letter, so the bad weather conveniently gave me an out.
Mixed-up thoughts
Looking back I have to wonder what I told my kids about Santa when they were young. Mom would say, “Christmas isn’t about the presents. It’s every little thing we do for each other throughout the year.” I bought into the message but, growing up I understood that her actions were different from her words.
While we agreed that Christmas Mass commemorates the joyous celebration of the birth of Christ and sparks heartfelt gratitude throughout the year, we totally disagreed on the commercial aspect of Christmas. I much prefer the simplicity of shared homemade goods and time spent together talking, laughing, and eating instead of meaningless gift exchanges that were most likely last-minute purchases.
Living on a shoestring budget, I spoke to Mom off and on about making Christmas shopping less stressful. “Why don’t we draw names instead? The adults will be fine with one gift, and the kids can still get their gifts as usual. I’m perfectly fine with no gifts. Besides, we already have everything we need.”
Mom’s response? “You don’t have to buy anything if you don’t want to.” Based on the tone of her voice and her facial expression, Christmas traditions would continue as usual. I’d be excused from gift giving, but she wouldn’t bring up gift exchange options to the other family members.
Discomforting disequilibrium
In essence, I was the only one granted immunity from the insanity. This meant that everyone would shop for everyone else while I didn’t have to unless, of course, my guilt got the better of me. But why?
Mom’s mixed messages were a year-round agony. With each month of the year, Christmas loomed big, bigger, biggest. Spending at Christmas meant spending on other special occasions, too. It was a never-ending money pit: a have to, not a want to. I hated spending money I didn’t have.
Additionally, my nonconformity weighed me down so much that I dreaded the holidays. I was resentful of the commercialism, resentful that I couldn’t relax during our two weeks off from school, resentful of having to accept mom’s ways. If Christmas is truly about celebrating God’s gift to us, then why bother with the commercialism? To make matters worse, my kids always sided with mom. Christmas was all about presents and being at mom’s house during the holidays, and I was the family misfit who never got Christmas right.
2004
Then came the first of two of the most grueling years of my life, thanks to the self-inflicted UH chaos that both exasperated and revitalized me. My only escape came very late each night when I flopped onto bed with my rosary beads. As I lay in an almost catatonic state in the dark, the repetitive prayers were fulfilling, purposeful, and peaceful.
That entire summer I took three whopper online courses that left time for only late morning Mass on Sunday and, on occasion, quick stops for supplies at Kmart, Staples, and Walmart on the way home. Twelve-thirty Mass at St. Mary’s was the big event in my week. I celebrated my visits to God’s house by dressing up for the special occasion. I told God I needed only him in my solitary life. He was with me day and night through my doctoral studies and all else.
Autumn followed, accompanied by my elementary school teaching assignment and all the extras: grading papers, writing lesson plans and timelines, and so much more. My responsibilities grew enormously as the semester progressed, and Christmas break included developing a training session— a last-minute holiday assignment from the principal— that my teacher-buddy, Elsa, and I were to present to the campus paraprofessionals our first day back at work, January 2005.
Christmas Eve
Although Elsa and I met a couple of times to plan the overview, the responsibility was mine alone; so I put in very long hours each day. I enjoyed the self-imposed challenge; but sometime past eight o’clock Christmas Eve, I was suddenly distracted. Sitting by the window in the front bedroom, I looked onto the street from my thoughtful spot at the computer and had a revelation: I’ll write a letter to Santa. Anyway, God will listen. Together they’ll work it out.
For almost three-and-a-half hours I worked on the letter. It wasn’t easy. I had to be sure my words were precise but, eventually, I organized my thoughts into three lists: what I want, what I’m willing to compromise on, and the deal breakers.
What’s going on?
Then, just as I completed the letter, I heard my neighbors’ grown children out in their front yard. I looked out the window and heard loud voices: “Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!” Lucy’s kids and grandkids were super excited as they hopped around gleefully. I looked at the clock: Midnight.
I went to the front door, opened it, and clearly heard, “It’s snowing! It’s snowing!”
As I’d finished my letter to Santa snow had fallen— this based on when the commotion from Lucy’s kids had started— but skeptical me refused to believe it. As far as I knew Brownsville hadn’t seen snow in my lifetime. Or maybe even at all.
Bah, humbug!
Minutes later, the doorbell rang. My next-door neighbor had sent over a plate of buñuelos with her grandkids. Eric and Mary were so wired that they went on and on about the snow, while I kept insisting it was only ice.
Once the kids left, I printed my letter and taped it to the closet door. I continued working on the prototype for the paraprofessionals’ inservice until four-something. I’d attended early evening Mass, so I didn’t need to be out and about later in the morning. I could sleep to my heart’s content.
On rising hours later I opened the front door. Everything was covered with white slush. The sun was out and Lucy’s family, still making a big deal out of the snow, was outdoors. I refuted the obvious. Snow could never fall in Brownsville. It’s way too tropical for that. But, one thing I could definitely bank on was having a legitimate excuse not to drive to mom’s for Christmas dinner and endure the guilt of not having bought gifts. So, I got to work without giving Santa’s letter a second thought.
Between then and fall 2005, I read through my three lists to Santa at least twice. I wasn’t wishing; I was merely checking to see if I still agreed with what I’d written. I’d already forgotten the snow as if it’d never happened and— even when a book with the Christmas photos sold in stores mid-year— I still refused to acknowledge the unexpected miracle of snow, not for a moment connecting the specialness of the snow with my letter to Santa on Christmas Eve.
(South Texas Weather Journal: Fall 2014 & Santa’s Post Office: Kingsville, TX Museum)
Unexpected happenings
Interestingly, though, something did start to happen early November. I was fully immersed in my studies and way too inundated by work to have the time, energy, or desire for change but, the more I tried to stay on track with daily decades-old routines, the more I was drawn, pushed, and forced in other directions. My life was unbelievably comical and out of control! Every situation was exaggerated and discombobulated. Caution led to upheavals; acceptance, to change and good outcomes.
Figuratively, doors slammed in my face in my relatively-stable-until-then life. Yet, I glided seemingly unscathed through unknowns that I’d never seriously considered would lead to my future life— all this after Dr. Weber, our research methodologist, had advised against making changes during our doctoral studies. We had too much going on to tackle anything else.
God’s gift
Nevertheless, God introduced Steven to me through a smile: a simple electronic postcard through a trusted Christian network.
Scenarios evoked laughter and disbelief as our lives became flowcharts of endless possibilities pushing us together quickly, and life spun out of control beyond imagining. We fell in love with each other’s mind before meeting face to face for the first time in one month’s time, Friday, December second. Totally nutz!
The more we tried to slow down our long-distance relationship, the more we were catapulted to events and dates we hadn’t even discussed; so we agreed to let God take charge. We stopped fighting the inevitable: God’s master plan included a rushed special delivery in time for our very first Christmas.
Continued affirmations
Even now we’re still God’s bestest gift to each other. And God continues to stay in touch through impeccably-timed Easter egg messages. For instance, several months after we got married, I unexpectedly discovered my letter to Santa. Reading through the lists I couldn’t believe my eyes. Every single item on the what I want list had come true down to the very last detail— and then some. My eyes watered as I recalled Christmas Eve 2004. God had indeed been listening!
God’s master plan
Mind you, we have our days like everyone else. We struggle, we fall, we pick ourselves up. But, on occasion, we wonder what if until God, in his infinite goodness, faithfully communicates through perfectly timed messages like those received during Mass last Saturday. First, my eyes watered as I read through the previous day’s meditation: Zechariah’s doubts changed to trust and belief in God’s message.
Lord, let me trust you, even in difficult times. Fill me with your Spirit, and equip me to proclaim what you have spoken in the silence of my heart! (the Word among us, Advent 2008, p. 42).
Next, Fr. Xaviour’s homily resonated with the fullness of truth as if he’d known exactly what I’d been feeling.
Accept and become a servant of God’s master plan. With God nothing is impossible.
Then, after communion, the gold goose egg dropped out of the sky.
Heavenly Father, I ask you for a sign today. Show me that you are with me…. Let me rely on you as the one who provides for my deepest longings (p. 43).
The enormity of the triple-treat revelation blew me away!
Ask, receive
Looking back, my letter to Santa led to God’s gift of love. “Ask and you shall receive… for the one who asks, receives” (Mt. 7:7-8). And then “look for signs of God’s love, even silly signs, signs that make sense only to us” (Meyer, 2008). The unexpected miracle of snow at midnight, Christmas Eve 2004, had been God’s special way of acknowledging my request— just as it’d been his wish that Santa deliver his very special gift exactly one year later, Christmas Eve 2005.
Santa, wonder-worker
Finally, revisiting Sam’s forward, yes. Jesus is better than Santa. But personally? I prefer to keep Christmas year ’round. When needs are “great and the crisis so near,” it’s okay to turn to Santa, our dear St. Nicholas, the wonder-worker, for “a happy ending” (Perrotta in the Word among us, Advent 2008, p. 55). When we humble ourselves and accept God’s master plan, Santa does indeed make good on his deliveries regardless of the time involved.
Merry Christmas!!!
December 23, 2012
Mary went without delay to communicate her joy to her cousin Elizabeth…. This is the real commitment of Advent: to bring joy to others. Joy is the true gift of Christmas, not expensive presents that demand time and money (Pope Benedict XVI in the Word among us, Advent 2012, p. M59).
December 9, 2013
God, our Father, we pray that through the intercession of St. Nicholas you will protect our children. Keep them safe from harm and help them grow and become worthy in your sight. Give them strength to keep their faith in you; and to keep alive their joy in your creation.
May 23, 2014
When a man loves a woman, he has to become worthy of her. The higher her virtue, the more noble her character, the more devoted she is to truth, justice, goodness, the more a man has to aspire to be worthy of her. The history of civilization could actually be written in terms of the level of its women (Ven. Fulton J. Sheen).
September 30, 2014
“The face is the mirror of the mind, and eyes without speaking confess the secrets of the heart” (St. Jerome).
November 24, 2015
We do not define ourselves as men or as women through our work, our house, our health, or our reputation. We define ourselves as men and women through the way we love (Chiara Corbella Petrillo).
December 1, 2015
“Love consists of a commitment which limits one’s freedom— it is a giving of the self, and to give oneself means just that: to limit one’s freedom on behalf of another” (St. John Paul II).
December 18, 2015
“Love between man and woman cannot be built without sacrifices and self-denial” (St. John Paul II).
July 6, 2016
Jesus has invested marriage with a dignity which represents something quite new in reference to all that we have considered until now. He raised it to the rank of a sacrament. He made of this sacred bond a specific source of grace. He transformed marriage— already sacred in itself— into something sanctifying (Dietrich von Hildebrand in Marriage: The mystery of faithful love).
December 6, 2016
“A happy family is but an earlier heaven” (George Bernard Shaw).
“Our first great responsibility is to be a family, a community, revealing first to one another something of God’s love and concern and tenderness” (St. Teresa of Calcutta).
December 6, 2017
It’s well known that Saint Nicholas, a sixth-century bishop, is behind our use of the secular “icon” of Christmas, Santa Claus. The legends of Nicholas involve his generosity to those in need.
The details of Nicholas’ life are few; but legends often have a kernel of truth and, if so, he forms a worthy basis for reflection during this season of preparation for Christmas. Advent is a time to expect God’s intervention in our lives. It may be dramatic, or— more typically— quiet and perhaps not immediately evident. God may even use a bit of stealth, as the legendary Nicholas did, to gift us. May we keep the windows of our heart open! (Greg Friedman, OFM, in Advent with the Saints: Daily Meditations).
Links of interest… All about Christmas: festive family fun / games, coloring, & more / inspiration / recipes / songs / North Pole / stories & poems (more) / traditions… Christmas… Doing what Christ has done… Five unexpected lessons about thinking… He isn’t Santa, but he gives us what we need… Isaiah: The prophet of Christmas… Lessons in growing up… Marriage: adventure & crisis / as martyrdom / dangers of “filler relationships” / five steps to surviving a crisis / lifetime / sacramental light in the darkness / trusting in God’s help… Materialism of Santa Claus & spirituality of Baby Jesus… Presence not presents… Santa Claus: about / do you believe in / North Pole Times (news, games, & more) / origin / setting up a news alert / village… St. Nicholas: about (more) / anecdote / biography / chapel tour / center / day ideas) / devotions / facts / feast (Dec 6) / legacy / saint / societies / still lives at the North Pole / visit / what he looks like / wonder-worker… Strange story of a real-life Santa Claus… White Christmas (Drifters cartoon)… Why my kids get letters from St. Nick every year… the Word among us…
WP posts… Morning exchanges… One prayer… Picturing God… Thanksgiving prayers
Filed under: Christmas, prayer, spiritual gifts, St. Nicholas, thanksgiving and praise | Tagged: building community, Corpus Christi Cathedral-Corpus Christi TX, God's master plan, overcoming adversity | Leave a comment »
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